BY HARRISON FRANK

As I walk through the halls of MHS every day, I can’t help but notice the abundance of students gripping beige cups. The seemingly ubiquitous Chicken Joe’s Iced Coffee (C.J.I.C.) has now become a fan favorite and has gone from trend to craze. This elixir has kids clamoring to suck the sweet nectar of Ramon’s hard work, like Chocolate Boy from “Hey Arnold.”

Obsession has turned to addiction, leading doctors and parents to question the harmful effects that caffeine has on teens. However, they need not worry. The recent influx of C.J.I.C. fans has more to do with how satisfying the “coffee” is to drink and less to do with the customers’ caffeine desires. Anyone who has ever seen these things knows that it’s a stretch to even call the drink coffee.

The ingredients in the drink consist of a 50/50 ratio of sugar to milk, about a tablespoon of coffee and however much ice it takes to fill the cup to the top. I hope you won’t be one of those unlucky souls who make the fatal mistake of sticking the straw down to the bottom of the cup, thus realizing what’s actually going into your body.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not preaching good health here; I’m just saying it is unfair to make people think that this is coffee. Adults don’t drink this; it might as well be Nesquick without the chocolate flavor, twice the sweetness and all the MSG. But don’t let my negative comments deter you from your next sip of “Coffee Crack,” as I like to call it; rather, just be aware that this is not coffee. It may be beneficial to the Senegalese economy, but it’s still not coffee.